The Sohma Diaries
by WannabeWerewolf
Summary: The secret thoughts of the Sohma family. Are Diaries this weird? Ritsu number two with his hacker skillz
1. Case One Yuki Sohma

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket nor any of its components. Sad as it may be, the best I can do is make up stories in my diabolical little mind. MWAHAHAHAHA!  
  
Slightly OOC? or MAJORLY OOC! HAR HAR HAR!  
  
The Sohma Diaries  
An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family  
What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive one~Summer thoughts~  
  
Case One  
Yuki Sohma  
  
April 25   
  
Dear Diary,  
  
Diary, I do not think that I can confide in anyone else. My self confidence has worn down to a neb. With the warm season in full bloom I am very self concious T_T. Oh Diary! I have never seen it before really, but that stupid cat has a nice body. When we enter a pool, what am I to do? Do I have to expose my chest for the world to see? I am too shy to wear T-shirts because it shows my lanky arms! And that stupid cat goes around half naked so girls can gawk at his chest.   
  
What am I doing wrong?! I try my best to get muscle! I steal Hatori's weights when I can! I help Miss. Honda carry the shopping bags! T_T... All the guys act so...well...manly. I feel like I am too feminine... What am I to do?  
  
O.O What If I'm gay, and I didn't realize it until now? Is that why? Is that why I am slim and not muscled like everyone else? Was my sex changed when I was in the early growing stages and I am a missing link? Maybe thats why I looked so good in the dress the seniors got me. I DID take it to offense when I was called cute...but the truth was... I was flattered... Maybe I just put up that front so I don't have to believe that I am...well...  
...  
...  
...  
Now I feel uncomfortable and self concious as if someone is reading over my shoulder and laughing at me. T_T Now my diary isn't safe too. I bet Shigure is going to go through my things so he can read this and tease me until the end of time  
  
Well damn you Shigure! Get your own diary to write in! Dumb dog...  
  
Oh no. That stupid cat. Knowing him, he will get a big neon sign that says "Yuki Is Gay" and put it on the schools front if he reads this. Then he will snap some sort of picture of a girl looking at herself in a mirror with a dress on and use Photoshop to put my face on it then he will print out one million copies and hand them out.  
  
T_T. So its either I accept my fate or get a plot of land where I can be buried when I commit suicide.  
  
  
~Yuki  
  
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Yes. It deserves flames. I know. The Yuki one was difficult to write but it is important for other characters entries.  
  
Please Review! If you review (flames are fine with me) you can suggest ideas for other characters entries.  
  
Ja!  
  
~Yami LinkMaster~ 


	2. Case Two Ayame Sohma

Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket. T_T. I don't own any anime, except this crappy little manga I'm making because I have no life. -____-  
  
The Sohma Diaries  
An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family  
What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive One ~Summer Thoughts~  
  
Case Two  
Ayame Sohma  
  
April 26  
  
My dearest oh so dear to me Diary....,  
  
Hello Diary! I must share with you how joy filled I am!!!!!! It is getting hot outside!!!! At long last I can flounce around in the dress I ordered from Sexy Males inc. I sent a smaller version of my dress to my dear baby brother. :D!!! I truly hope he wears it! It will make me so happy!!!   
  
The only problem with the warm weather is that when I enter water...I cant wear a regular male swimsuit can I?! I can show off in the bikini I bought! =D. I am o so glad I bought it so people can admire me and the results of my...um... operation. It would be embarassing if people were to see me with no bikini top. It is so pretty! It ties around the neck with pretty pink flowers and has a low neck line! ^____^  
  
One has to have class right?! HAR HAR HAR!  
  
What If my extensions decide to be mean to me and fall out? T_T My beautiful silver locks! *sob* And my gold contacts might start to irritate me... all aside, those lovely prints from Sexy Males inc. are the best in summer time. The lovely purple print is my favorite. I bought that print and it came with matching underwear!! How adorably kawaii!! Mine helped measure it for me so it could fit my lovely figure *sighs happily*  
  
Anyway, I had the most lovely chat with Gure-chan today. I would have stayed over the night but I felt the little children may need their rest for school the next morning and me and Gure-Chan would have kept them up all night with the noise if I stayed in Gure-Chan's room. Ha ha ha! I wouldn't get much sleep either because Gure-chan would keep me up all night. I don't want circles under my eyes do I dear Diary? It would ruin my complexion :(  
  
With lots of love! 3 Ayame 3  
  
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^____________________________^ Ayame's character is just so FUN to work with! :) =)  
  
Please review! I get discouraged If i don't get them, like people aren't enjoying my stories T_T.  
Flames are O.K =D Just keep in mind that it is humor, and is ment to be sarcastic of course :) Isn't it just more fun that way??  
  
Ja!  
  
~Yami LinkMaster~ 


	3. Case Three Hatori Sohma

Disclaimer:*sob* I don't own all the kawaii characters of Fruits Basket! I wish I owned Shigure because he is my most FAVORITE character OF ALL TIME!!!!! *giggles madly* Ok. I got that out of my system. *cough*  
  
The Sohma Diaries  
An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family  
What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive One ~Summer Thoughts~  
  
Case Three  
Hatori Sohma  
  
Today Is The Twenty-Seventh Of April.  
  
Hello Diary.  
  
It is I Hatori. Yes. I have returned from my doctoral studies to enter a composition consisting of my day to day activities.  
My words of the day are Neuraminidase and Dung.  
I tried my very hardest to involve these two words in a sentence today. I got slapped as a result.   
I do not understand it.   
No person likes me T_T. So today, I tried to take action and become more likable. I enrolled in bagpipe and lap harp studies. The instructor says I am doing very very well. :).  
  
Now that summer is on its way, I have noticed that Yuki and Ayame were acting odd. Odd for Yuki. Completely normal behavior for Ayame, however, I noticed that Ayame's chest looks bigger. I decided not to bring anything up. However I noticed that my eyes frequently fell down to Ayame's chest as he was speaking and I couldn't tear them away. At that moment Kyo walked by and commented that I was "horny" or something similar to that. I had no notion of what he was talking about so I dismissed it. I have the feeling however that it wasn't nice.  
  
Yuki on the other hand is always looking in the mirror, and looking in women's catalogs when he was sitting in my office. Walking in the bar the other night, Yuki was on the stage singing Karaoke. [A/N: OMG! Thank you so much Cynthia for giving me the idea!] He was singing My Heart Will Go On, and I Like Big Butts or something similar to that. I have to say, I highly enjoy that song.  
  
I then went on stage and sang "The Last Unicorn"  
  
And although I am highly ashamed of myself, I have to confess, Yuki and I got drunk and the last thing I remember is us going on stage together and we sang "Why Not"  
  
I then awoke to find myself in a dumpster. T_T.  
  
Anyway, for the summer, I ordered a swim suit for when Shigure and Ayame drag me to the beach. Its red. With a dragon on it. :). For that event I tried to prepare my body when I noticed that my weights and massaging creams were missing. I couldn't find them anywhere so I went out and got new ones.  
  
I then took a trip to the gym and used the treadmill for a while. It was fun :)  
  
Sincerely Yours,  
Hatori  
  
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:D :D :D :D Poor Hatori-san is so insecure!! =) =) =)Singing the last unicorn!! omg bad image! :) :) :)  
Next episode:   
Case Four: Kyo  
  
Ja!  
  
~Yami LinkMaster~ 


	4. Case Four Kyo Sohma

Disclaimer: I don't own fruits basket, nor am I japanese, so i well...obviously...dont own it. heh heh  
  
The Sohma Diaries  
  
An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family  
  
What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive One ~Summer Thoughts~  
  
Case Four  
  
Kyo Sohma  
  
May 9th   
  
Sup  
  
That damn rat ignored me today. ALL DAY!! I was so frigging dissapointed! I was looking foward to have an excuse to talk with him. ;_;  
  
The best I got was Ayame talking to me. I got flustered (My cheeks turned red!! WTF?!) when I tried to insult the damn bastard so I gave up and layed on the roof to continue writing my novel. I had to steal Shigure's romance story for tips. I think it is going very well. I am almost done. Im gonna have to publish the thing with a pen name. I think I'll use Kuro-Neko Sama. Yeah sure, I did rip it off Trigun!! But I like it You stupid bastard.  
  
Why the hell am I arguing to myself in this damn thing?? Its not like anyone else is going to bother reading it anyway...  
  
...  
  
...  
  
...unless....  
  
that damn rat turns to March 14th. O.O eep.  
  
W/E. Madame Pierre said my dancing was going very well. My recital is in August. I dunno who to invite. My first instinct was Tohru. Maybe I will invite Hatori. He appreciates fine art. And he gave me private lessons so I have to say thank you somehow. But then maybe that bastard Ayame will show up. Then Shigure. I think Shigure knows about it. I saw a little flag in his damn office with an orange cat, and it said "Sophisticated Kyo" So that dirty bastard will probaby wave it while I dance on stage and make my attention wander. The bastard. And he will come in that gay kimono. WTF IS THAT?! [A/N: Dont make fun of pweety Shigures Kimono! *bash* *huggles Shigure* *POOF*]  
  
Yuki. Yuki will find out. Yuki will come. WTF. My stomach just did a flip flop. I feel giddy. I think I drank too much Red Bull  
  
Kyo  
  
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Kyos entry was a bitch ^.^ Please review! Flames are OK!   
  
~Yami LinkMaster~ 


	5. Case 5 Tohru Honda

Disclaimer: Dont own it. Nope nope.   
  
The Sohma Diaries  
  
An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family  
  
What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive One ~Summer Thoughts~  
  
Case Five   
  
Tohru Honda  
  
Hi Diary!  
  
Well, Everything has been going okay for the past few days. I am so very happy! Ritsu came to visit today! He seemed to have his mind on something rather serious so I didn't bother him much.   
  
I decided to make it a scheduale to go to Teh Navi every Tuesday now! I have never been to a club, but I like this one. I will go every Tuesday. Uo came with me. Uo told me not to tell any of the Sohma's. I was about to decline going to the club but then I remembered when Hatori told me to go to Sohma house and not tell anyone he was trying to help me. But I never get to see Uo anyway :( She walks off with a boy every time. So I sit at the bar, and the man is so nice! He gives me drinks! I feel dizzy afterward. Uo tells me to dunk my head in cold water before I go home. I listen to her advice. It usually works. But now Shigure thinks that it rains when I walk home ^_^ And I have a headache in the morning :(  
  
I guess I'll be going to Teh Navi now. Im really thirsty. And Uo just called ^_^  
  
Bye bye!  
  
Tohru  
  
P.S Yuki and Kyo were acting really withdrawn lately. I do hope they are O.K!  
  
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O.O Bad bad Tohru. Uo is a bad influence...  
  
~Yami LinkMaster~ 


	6. Case Six Shigure Sohma

Disclaimer: ;_; Dont you wanna own them? That way you could hug 'em all day!  
  
The Sohma Diaries  
  
An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family  
  
What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive One ~Summer Thoughts~  
  
Case 6: Shigure Sohma  
  
I love this Xanga! Its so shiny! Ri-chan taught me HTML. I think the pink background and blue scrollbar go well together.   
  
And he helped me with the chatter box see? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
If you want to go to his Xanga, at my viewed site list, click GomenNasai21.   
  
Yesturday Mii and I went to Teh Navi. It has an adjoining arcade and I played DDR. Oh, how wonderful it is from the stressful writers life to dance to Dive, trick mode, against a high school girl!!!  
  
Mii gave me a break since I completed my manuscript on time ^_^.   
  
~pRoPz pLeAse~  
  
9 Props 6 Comments  
  
O Props from:  
  
ScratchyOrangeCat  
  
ILoveYukiSohma  
  
1 Prop from:  
  
ThErAtPrInCe  
  
2 Props from:  
  
GomenNasai21  
  
SnAkEsArEsQuIgGlY  
  
AnOptomisticOnigiri  
  
DragonsAreMythicalBeasts  
  
Comment from:ScratchyOrangeCat  
  
You pervert!! What the hell are you doing playing DDR?!  
  
Comment from:ILoveYukiSohma  
  
That "Highschool girl" was me you sick dumbass! And how the hell did you beat me wearing that dress?!  
  
Comment from:ThErAtPrInCe  
  
Your an idiot.  
  
Comment from:GomenNasai21  
  
You didn't have to mention me Shi-san! I am not worthy enough!!!! ;_;  
  
Comment from:SnAkEsArEsQuIgGlY  
  
Ah!! Gure-Chan!! Invite me to Teh Navi next time!!!!!!! PrOpz FoR yOu!!!!!  
  
Comment from:AnOptomisticOnigiri  
  
Shigure-san, I am so glad you enjoyed yourself! DDR sounds like lots of fun^_^  
  
Comment from:DragonsAreMythicalBeasts  
  
Shigure, you should really learn to be a more responsible and likable person, like me.   
  
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-^__________________________^- Shigure's on Xanga heh heh heh heh.   
  
Please, please please review!! You can flame if you feel like it!!!  
  
~Yami Linkmaster~ 


	7. Case 7 Ritsu Sohma

Disclaimer: Nope! Still don't own it!

The Sohma Diaries

An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family

What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???

Archive One Summer Thoughts

Case 6: Ritsu Sohma

Dear Diary,

Oh Diary, I am so sorry that I hadn't written in you yesterday! I was far

too busy on Bach my Alienware that I completely forgot!!! Please forgive me.

Now I have two days of things to write to you about! I hope you don't mind diary!!!!

Well...it all began when I woke up late yesterday. As you know, I need to

rise at 7:30 to check my inbox. But I was incredibly lazy and I woke

up at a quarter to instead!!! So I had to rush to Bach and log in. I received a

vision whilst I was sleeping, that the Toys R Us mainframe would change its

password as it changed its site layout. Of course this was my chance, so to

find out the password, I took out the Ouija board and communicated to find

out what the Toys R Us administrators changed the password to. It only took

me about 5 minutes to communicate beyond, and the spirits told me the new

password was seerTneerGEkil. I apologized profusely for taking up their

time, and with my uber l33t hacking talents...I WAS ON THE TOYS R US

ADMINISTRATORS SECTION!

Diary, what a success this is! I always dreamed to hack onto the Toys R Us

mainframe, and now...here I am! So now, Diary, I am sitting cozy with the

contents of Toys R Us in my room. I made sure to get gifts for everyone as

well so they wont be frustrated with me! I hope they like their gifts!

This is what I got them:

Shigure-san: A Tamogatchi! I am sure Shigure will love the new responsibility!

Yuki: Mouse Trap. You build the whole trap and everything! That sounds like alot of fun!

Hatori-san: A plastic golf set. Hatori-san needs a leisurly sport.

Ayame-san: A Do-My-Hair Barbie. I did not know what to get him, so maybe he

can somehow use this in his shop.

Kyo: An Easy-Bake oven. From what Kazuma-san told me, Kyo enjoyed preparing meals in the mountains.

Hiro: A real motorized Jeep! I am pretty sure Hiro can still fit in one.

Kisa and Tohru: Laser Tag! They are friends so laser tag is a good idea.

Akito: Hungry Hungry Hippo's. I always heard that was a very fun game.

Kagura: Operation. I know it takes patience to get the pieces out. I am sure

Kagura will like that

Kureno: A kite! Like Hatori-san, Kureno needs a leisurly sport.

Haru: A Good Luck Bear Care-Bear. I do hope he likes it. I think his

favorite color is green.

Rin: A Baby Furby.

Momiji: I e-mailed my friend and asked him for a suggestion of a video game

that young teen boys like. He said Grand Theft Auto so I got that for Momiji.

I'll be mailing off their gifts today Diary. I hope they like them. I will

be so ashamed of myself that I did not think long and hard enough to get

them proper gifts.

Feedback appreciated and flames accepted


	8. Case Eight Akito Sohma

The Sohma Diaries An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive One Summer Thoughts  
  
Case Eight The one and only...drumroll AKiTo SoHmA  
  
May 14th 3:27 am.  
  
Hello Mable-  
  
I cannot help to be depressed Mable. Every day I am haunted with my unescapable doom. The pain bleeds off me as if my entire body is being speared with the blades of Satan. My pen is the only outlet for my dark and doomed destiny. My soul runs through the words like the wind blows through the trees, echoing my thirst to live. Flowers bloom with re-birth as Summer awakens to a barren land, and the earth rejoices.  
  
But harken! I have not been awakened with the warmth on my cold lifeless flesh. My soul thirsts for the sun on my face, and the earth beneath my weary feet...but nay, I have to deny the request of my weeping soul, and remain indoors. The life-giving sun must be hidden from my cold flesh. I wither away in despair as I watch the family carry out their lives.  
  
Oh Mable! I am the foundation of the curse...Like the skeleton of the house, I must remain to support the components. Like the wind that carry's the majestic hawk, I must allow the Sohma house to fly...to glide majestically, as I carry it toward its destination.  
But with the burden I shed the blood and tears of an oppressed slave, destined to wait on time, like a tiny ant on Earth, so I feel I serve no purpose but to work. The poetry I write serves as a lasting momento to the shattered soul that lies within my dull eyes. My soul aches with worry as I age, my body grows weak, and my skin prickles with fear.  
  
Dark roses bloom around my soul. I am pricked with their thorns and my soul bleeds onto the life of the flower. I am impure, as are the flowers around me. I dirty they're souls as well. .  
.  
How did you like that Mable, I put it on Fictionpress and got five reviews. My bleeding soul has to have the opportunity to speak to the remains of the shattered earth. Blood must be shed in order for a sun to rise slowly over the horizon  
  
Sincerely Yours,  
Akito (Miffy to you)  
  
Oh dear me Akito. You suck at gothic poetry and you named your diary. 


	9. Case NineHiro Sohma

Disclaimer: Yes yes, I don't own Fruits Basket...I do own this Diary plot, (plot eh?)

Ah yes, the typos are on purpose

The Sohma Diaries  
An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family  
What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive oneSummer thoughts

July 22

Diearee--

Kisa encuraged me to "write my thouhts down" so I went out and got this. It says I am supposed to wright down my feelinghs and wat I did tooday soo I'll do it for her.

I got this pakage in the mail and it was this big box and it was frum the monkee I see every new years. He got me this this truk i can drive arround in so I took it out for a driive arround the souma compouund.

Ferst, befour I culd drivee it, I stolle Hatori's tool kit and pryed open the hoode to tweeak the enjine. I needead to raisse the maxeemum speed. I hopped in and starded to drivee arround and maybee that waz a misstake becuz I drovee past Hatori's housee and he saw me and he probabely figyoured that I tooke his tool kit and he ran out of his housee and starded to chasee me faast. He gott a lot fasteer sincee the laste time he chaseed me, but my truk was stiil fasteer, and he tripped ovver his doctor cowt and fell, and I waas able to get awae.

Now thaat i thiink about it, wen did Hatori actooaly uze tools? Wen did he get soo faste? How n y did I get this truk?

Y hasent Akito been a-round?

Thaats weired. Evryone is acteeng weired.

As long as Kisa doesent act weired I will be ohk.

maebe that gerl wud mayke Kisa weired.

I wont leet thate happin. I will haf to stop her. Its her fawlt that everryonee is acting weired. i am going to Akito's toomoreoh and tell hm

----Hiro

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Thank you for sticking around for this entry!!! I would appreciate feedback and suggestions, what i am doing wrong (or right) and, as always, flames are accepted.


	10. Case 10 Akito part deux

Disclaimer: Don't own Fruits Basket yep. Dont own any toys mentioned below either. They probably belong to Mattel.

Warning: If ya hadn't noticed already, the characters are OOC. I know they are OOC. I made them so that they are OOC.

Well, enjoy ;;

The plot thickens....

The Sohma Diaries  
An Archive of secrets made by the Sohma family  
What are the Sohma's thinking in their silly little heads???  
  
Archive oneSummer thoughts

Case Ten

Akito Sohma....(again)

Today is the twenty-third of July.

Greetings again Mable....

I have recieved a gift from one of the Sohma's. It seems to be some sort of game. It seems that the object of the game is to win the most marbles by making a hippopotamus consume them and bring them to their own side.

Doesn't that reflect on real life Mable? A constant struggle to gain food, and affection, and try to bring those marbles to your side. How fascinating. How fascinating that such toys mirror the human race and its strife so accurately....

But another event came up today Mable. Hiro stopped by my house for a visit today in some kind of miniature jeep. It seemed that he had something to discuss with me.

I, of course, allowed the boy in, and we sat down to discuss this issue that this young child had.

From what he has told me, it seems that alot of my dear family members are acting strange. He had blamed it on the Honda girl. I did not know how to react to that. I did not notice anyone acting bizarre, but I listened to his claim anyway.

The boy stated that the Honda girl had influenced them to behave in certain manners.

I, being one who doesn't jump to conclusions, listened quietly and politely to what Hiro had to say about how to take care of the delicate situation.

Hiro seemed to want to make sure that the Honda girl's influence would cease. I assumed that would mean to get rid of her.

Of course, I have to see for myself. I will take numerous visits to observe my dear family members.

Children seem so rash these days. Am I the only Sohma who thinks before he makes any rash decisions? Maybe the Sohma's should take a leaf out of my book. I am sure this family would benefit by doing so.

Well, Mable, I apologize that this is such a short entry. I had not written any new poetry to share with you. I can hardly wait tommorow, however, to see your deep red cover waiting for me to open.

Sincerely yours,

Miffy

P.S- I almost forgot to tell you...I seemed to have lost my balance today, and took a tumble out of the window as I was gazing out of it. Silly me.

--------------------------------------------------

Thanketh to all my reviewers, ah and sofia815, ILoveYukiSohma are any of the Yuki Fanclub girls. They all share that name

Feedback greatly appreciated and flames accepted! eats fudgebar


	11. H4x0r

Disclaimer: insert previous disclaimers here 

Be Warned: I hope you understand the world of the l33t

The Sohma Diaries

Autumn Archive

Ritsu Sohma

)14ry-

1 4/ 337 -4x0r!!

1 pwnd j00 4ll, ph0r 1 4m 1337 w1th my $killz0rz.

1 cr4s-0rd t-3 m41 )4t4b4s3 0f 3-b4y

0h0$3 1$ phi113) /1th $tph

Brb /4rcr4pht pwnz0rz j00 f00s

-337 -4x0r R1T$


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